The healthiest friendships are not created by accident. They are not the result of proximity or common interest. The best friendships are created with intention and purpose. So how do we create these friendships and how can you be a stronger friend to those in your life right now?



They aren’t by circumstance. They are on purpose. And you have control over the
direction of your friendships. It’s your responsibility.

A friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need. [Proverbs 17:17]

 This is my commandment: Love each other in the same way I have loved you. There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. [John 15:12]

He tells us he wants us to love our friends in the same way that he loved his disciples.

One day as Jesus was walking along the shore of the Sea of Galilee, he saw two
brothers—Simon, also called Peter, and Andrew—throwing a net into the water, for they fished for a living. 19 Jesus called out to them, “Come, follow me, and I will show you how to fish for people!”20And they left their nets at once and followed him. 21A little farther up the shore he saw two other brothers, James and John, sitting in a boat with their father, Zebedee, repairing their nets. And he called them to come, too. 22 They immediately followed him, leaving the boat and their father behind. [Matthew 4:18-22]


1. He initiated

Jesus took the first step.

So if I’m loving my friends in the same way Jesus loves us, I’m initiating with them.
I’m not waiting for them to text me. I’m going to text them. I’m not waiting for our Life Group to meet again. I’m going to reach out to them. Because great friendships are on purpose. Great friends initiate.

Great friendships are built, not chosen.

2. He invited.

As Jesus was walking along, he saw a man named Matthew sitting at his tax collector’s booth. “Follow me and be my disciple,” Jesus said to him. So Matthew got up and followed him. [Matthew 9:9]

To love your friends like Jesus did means to Initiate with them. Invite new ones in.

You are my friends if you do what I command. [John 15:14]


Application Questions

1. What stood out to you from this message and why?

2. What is one thing God is telling you to START doing because of this message?

3. What is one thing God is telling you to STOP doing because of this message?

4. How will this message change how you act at home, work and in the your relationships?