I can’t measure up! Have I done enough to prove it my worth? People can’t see that I don’t have it all together! These are some of the lies and negative thoughts that haunt our minds on a daily basis. But no matter how much you try to have it all together, pursuing control and perfection leaves you feeling exhausted, depleted, and like God couldn’t love you. In this video, Sean Sears shares from the Bible how you can get a handle on these negative thoughts, stop the feelings of guilt and disappointment, and find rest knowing you don’t have to be perfect.



 There’s nothing wrong with pursuing good but it becomes unhealthy when it causes us to hide the uglier parts of ourselves from God and others.




[Ecclesiastes 7:20]

“Not a single person on earth is always good and never sins.”


[‭Romans 3:23]

“For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard.”


[John 13:4-9]

“4 So he got up from the table, took off his robe, wrapped a towel around his waist, 5 and poured water into a basin. Then he began to wash the disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel he had around him. 6 When Jesus came to Simon Peter, Peter said to him, “Lord, are you going to wash my feet?” 7 Jesus replied, “You don’t understand now what I am doing, but someday you will.” 8 “No,” Peter protested, “you will never ever wash my feet!” Jesus replied, “Unless I wash you, you won’t belong to me.” 9 Simon Peter exclaimed, “Then wash my hands and head as well, Lord, not just my feet!”



[Matthew 12:20]

“He will not crush the weakest reed or put out a flickering candle…”





[John 13:12-15]

“12 After washing their feet, he put on his robe again and sat down and asked, “Do you understand what I was doing? 13 You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and you are right, because that’s what I am. 14 And since I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash each other’s feet. 15 I have given you an example to follow. Do as I have done to you.”


Dallas Willard, “Grace is opposed to earning but not effort.”


[Matthew 23:27-28]

“27 What sorrow awaits you teachers of religious law and you Pharisees. Hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs—beautiful on the outside but filled on the inside with dead people’s bones and all sorts of impurity. 28 Outwardly you look like righteous people, but inwardly your hearts are filled with hypocrisy and lawlessness.”


“If you try too hard to control what other people see, what other people see will start to control you.”



“The more you see yourself as perfected, the less tolerant you are of imperfections in others.”





Brene Brown (top 5 TED talks) on vulnerability: “Those who have a strong sense of love and belonging have the courage to be imperfect.”


[1 John 4:15-19]

“15 All who declare that Jesus is the Son of God have God living in them, and they live in God. 16 We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love. God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them. 17 And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world. 18 Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love. 19 We love each other because he loved us first.”


[Matthew 22:37-40]

““Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments.”



Application Questions

  1. What stood out to you from this message and why?
  2. What is one thing God is telling you to START doing because of this message?
  3. What is one thing God is telling you to STOP doing because of this message?
  4. How will this message change how you act at home, work and in your relationships?