We used to see marriage as the pinnacle of romantic relationships. It was the goal to live happily ever after. But today, fewer couples are getting married than ever before. And of those who do, the stats show most couples don’t make it “until death do we part”. So what is it that makes marriage so tough and is it really even worth it anymore? Or are we just missing something?

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MESSAGE NOTES

Where Does Marriage Come From?

 

[Genesis 2:18, 21-24]

“Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep. While the man slept, the Lord God took out one of the man’s ribs and closed up the opening. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man. “At last!” the man exclaimed. “This one is bone from my bone, and flesh from my flesh! She will be called ‘woman,’ because she was taken from ‘man.’” This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.”

 

“This is why a lot of people today feel uncertain about marriage. We’re afraid of being in a situation where…it becomes painfully clear, by the disappointment etched on the face of our spouse, that we have nothing left to give. That’s why some people in this room are afraid of marriage. Marriage exposes us. It’s a miracle if a marriage gets better over time. If anything, we’re more confident that over time it’ll go flat like old soda.”

 

Sobering stats on Marriage:

  • Average length of an American marriage is 8.2 years
  • Wedding every 16 seconds and a divorce ever 42 seconds
  • USA is third highest country for divorce
  • Therefore, in the last thirty years, married households have dropped from 80% to 49%
  • Fewer couples get married now than ever before!
  • Cohabitation is even worse
    • 3x more likely to split up in the first 5 years
    • 2x more likely to split up in the first 10 years

 

What IF God’s way of doing sex and marriage really DID work?! 

  • Would you want to try it?!
  • What if I told you that less than 1% of couples who pray together daily ever get divorced? 
  • Would you begin praying daily???

 

God’s intention for marriage is to make you holy, not happy.

 

 

You can help protect your marriage by following three simple (but not easy) instructions.

 

  1. SUBMIT TO EACH OTHER

 

[Ephesians 5:21]

“And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.”

 

The only person capable of voluntary deference is someone who is emotionally healthy, self-aware and confident in their personhood

 

[Matthew 20:28]

“For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

 

2. WIVES FOLLOW YOUR HUSBANDS

 

[Ephesians 5:22-24]

“For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything.”

 

 

[John 13:12-15]

“After washing their feet, he put on his robe again and sat down and asked, “Do you understand what I was doing? You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and you are right, because that’s what I am. And since I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash each other’s feet. I have given you an example to follow. Do as I have done to you.”

 

Ladies, you are to submit to your husbands by following his example.

  • If he’s trying to reconcile, reconcile
  • If he’s showing interest in your day, show interest in his
  • He yields to you, you yield to him
  • He serves you, you serve him

 

 

3. HUSBANDS SET AN EXAMPLE OF SACRIFICIAL LOVE

 

[Ephesians 5:25-28]

“For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself.”

 

 

[Mark 10:42-44]

“So Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers in this world Lord it over their people, and officials flaunt their authority over those under them. But among you it will be different. Whoever wants to be a leader among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first among you must be the slave of everyone else.”

 

 

[1 Corinthians 7:4]

“The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.”

 

LAST WORD ON MARRIAGE

 

[Ephesians 5:31-33]

“As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one.” So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”

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Application Questions

1. What stood out to you from this message and why?

2. What is one thing God is telling you to START doing because of this message?

3. What is one thing God is telling you to STOP doing because of this message?

4. How will this message change how you act at home, work and in the your relationships?